Are you doing what I'm doing?

So I had brain surgery today, well, okay, it was on my head and it was minor.

So minor I could even drive myself home afterward.

So minor that the doctor had me sit in a normal doctor room chair for the procedure and not on the examination table. (That's a bit demeaning, isn't it, to the purpose of my being there?)

So minor the nurse stuck one of those small circle bandaids on it when it was done.

What? No "Go home and take it easy?"

No resting on the couch with propped up pillows and clear liquids?

No "Can you bring me some ice water and jello, please?" offered up in a pathetic voice?

He said I can wash my hair and, get this, I can swim.

Again. What? I am not submersing my cut-open-head in water, chlorinated or otherwise. I very specifically washed and straightened my hair this morning so that I could go a few days without shampooing.

Sheesh. Surgery these days.

Sorry, but I'm still going to take advantage. I've got a frozen lasagna going in the oven for dinner and at exactly 3 PM, I'm going on the couch with the ice water and propped up pillows. Oprah's interviewing author JK Rowling and I'm not going to miss it.



Yes, I overcame the whole must-watch-Oprah thing a while back when I determined that if I was going to finish a novel I had to give some things up, but I make an exception for authors and especially this one. How 'bout you? Even if a scalpel wasn't taken to your scalp today, I'm sure you can think of a good excuse for plopping yourself in front of the television for an hour. Call it research.

Are you failing 4th grade Math, too?

In the fourth grade I was a math whiz.

It's true.

At the front of the room my teacher had a poster of a tree with lots of branches, each one representing one of the times tables. The students had their own owl with their name on it and the owl would move from branch to branch as we passed off the ones, then the twos, then threes, and so on. My owl made it to the top of that tree. And in a very timely manner, I might add.

Now I find that I fail at 4th grade Math. My daughter asked me to check her work and I ended up helping her to change nearly every answer. The next day she came home and said they were all wrong but three.

Really?

I just don't understand the terms they use nowadays--mental math, front-end estimating...I can't even remember the others. I've already had to call my school-teacher daughter twice this school year to ask her what something meant. They just don't teach the same anymore.

Whatever happened to cute owls on branches?

(at least Spelling hasn't changed, right?)

(I was spelling champ in my 5th grade class.)

It's come to this

Last night I stayed up way too early rewriting a chapter of my novel and, you guessed it, once I went to bed the old cogs of the writing brain would not stop turning. I was afraid to look at the clock to see exactly how long it took me to finally fall asleep, I just know there were a total of three times I pulled out paper and pen in the dark to scribble something I was sure I'd forget by morning.

Despite my lack of sleep, morning still came, and it started with a six followed by other numbers which is not a big deal to many of you, but in the summer it is to me and especially after last night.

I stirred awake a bit while my husband was getting ready for work and the dream I was in the middle of still lingered. I thought, Now instead of having her say that I could have her act it out and the other person would know what she's talking about.

Then it hit me.

I'm editing the dream I just woke from.

Then I shook my mental fist at the looming lightbulb that's always above my head--the idea I have that I can write a novel--Nooooooo! I say. Let me rest in peace.

But there was certainly no more rest, or peace either, and with the lure of ibuprofen as my guide, I got up. I stumbled down the stairs with my bleary eyes and jammies, the bedside clipboard and pen in hand. My daughter was right there on her way out the door to work, and she said, "Do you always sleep with a clipboard?"

"Last night I did," I replied.

Now I'm going to read my chapter rewrite and all I'm saying is it better knock my slippers off or clipboards are going to roll.

[instant replay from anwafounder.blogspot.com]

Is it summer vacation yet?

I'm so busy I still haven't gotten around to procrastinating. I think it might be next on my list, though.

I've done some writing on my novel, I've done some reading too. I've done a lot of laundry (as the mountains of clean clothes will attest--apparently, I've done no folding of said laundry--again the mountains attest.) I've done a lot of wedding planning with my daughter, and a lot of Girl's Camp prep--vinyl lettering for 38 shirts among other things. I've given a mother-daughter lesson on Mother's Day. I've been to a temple open house with 60 youth and back, I've helped host a bridal shower, and even cleaned my house for the event. I've gone on a 3rd grade zoo field trip. I've attended a daughter's senior awards program. Still to come in about a week and a half's time is the wedding and Girl's Camp and a high school graduation, too.

No one finishes a novel in May.

Just saying.

Wednesday Waaaa-nt...

Rhymes with raaaant...


So I came home a week or two ago from a lovely Spain vacation refreshed, renewed, rejuvenated.

Well, in theory, anyway.

I complained to my sister about trying to get back into the swing of things after my trip. I said "When you don't cook and clean for 12 days..." and she finished with, "...it changes you."

That's it. In a nutshell.

Now can I rant (to myself) a moment about my novel and its lack of being finished? Yeah, that novel. The one that should have been sitting on an editor's desk yesterday (of last year) because I keep hearing stories in the news that match the subject of my book and yet its not done. Last night, my husband and I were watching CNN (the horrific bullying story that has hit the fan) and he said, "You would be interviewed on CNN if your book was published."

(Basically, as of right now, the blurb on my book would read It's a lot of words all together in a row.)

I think I just need a good dose of cooking and cleaning and I'll be back to normal.

As for the novel... I'm on a strict no sleeping, no eating, no breathing, no reading (that last one will be difficult) till it is DONE! No exercising either because, well, that's been consuming so much of my time of late. (J/K ;D)

[Other actual rants have been edited out of this blog. It was theraputic to express them, but I'm better now.]